Duncan Riley: “No I am not scared and neither should you be!”

Posted on December 13, 2007
Filed Under Web 2.0 Kool Aid |

Blogging Evangelist Duncan Riley has become Web 2.0’s version of the infamous Iraqi Information Minister (aka Baghdad Bob). In response to market research firm eMarketer’s projections that the growth in online ad spending will slow in the coming years, Democracy Duncan issued a statement reassuring Internet supporters everywhere and urging them not to panic. Although I was unable to read his statement because it was issued in a language that a cultural elitist such as myself cannot understand, the following translations were provided to me:

There is no slowdown in the growth of Internet ad spending. Never!

eMarketer is not even within 1000% of an accurate projection. eMarketer is not in any position to make projections. They hold no place in the Internets. This is an illusion … they are trying to sell to the others an illusion.

The old media people are committing suicide by the hundreds on the gates of Second Life. Be assured, Second Life is safe, protected.

My feelings - as usual - we will slaughter all old media.

We have destroyed 2 newspapers, record labels, 2 cable networks and their microphones. We have driven them back.

We’re giving them a real lesson today. Heavy doesn’t accurately describe the level of illegal downloads we have inflicted.

Faltering forces of cultural elitists cannot just enter a blog of 625,000 FeedBurner subscribers and lay besiege to them! They are the ones who will find themselves under siege. Therefore, in reality whatever this miserable Andrew Keen has been saying, he was talking about his own forces. Now even the cultural elitist command is under siege.

We defeated them yesterday. God willing, I will provide you with more information. I swear by God, I swear by God, those who are staying in New York and Los Angeles have thrown these journalists, writers, musicians and entertainers in a crematorium.

Thanks to Democracy Duncan, millions of bloggers, 72,000 Web 2.0 startups, hundreds of millions of Internet users and billions of liberated citizens of a world that’s changing for the better who rely on the Internets for access to free knowledge, will sleep well. AdSense will continue to keep the new economy moving ahead.

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3 Responses to “Duncan Riley: “No I am not scared and neither should you be!””

  1. Dennis Ramirez on December 13th, 2007 10:42 am

    Haha. You know, I’ve only recently found this site, and I am glad I did.


  2. Alex Linhares on December 13th, 2007 10:45 pm

    You don’t know anything, Drama. Soon there will be 72,000 internet billionaires to prove you wrong wrong wrong!, dude.

  3. Duncan Riley’s “Challenge to Network Television” Revisited : The Drama 2.0 Show on March 24th, 2008 10:08 pm

    […] June 30, 2007 one of the most addicted kool aid drinkers, Duncan Riley, proclaimed that the seeds of a revolution had been sown and that the “the missing link in […]

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