2007 Crunchies: The Winners

Posted on January 19, 2008
Filed Under Web 2.0 Kool Aid |

The Crunchies weren’t the Grammys but for a Silicon Valley production, they get a passing grade. It was a bit of a sausage fest, but that was to be expected. Mark Zuckerberg really disappointed me. He’s just really clueless about how to dress appropriately. Time to grow up, Mark. You’re 23, not 13. I was wearing Brioni suits when I was 19 so there’s no reason Mr. Billionaire can’t, at the very least, pick up some slacks and a sportcoat.

My memory right now is a little hazy but the highlight of the evening was a cute little Latin chick who works in legal and her hot friend from USF who actually kind of looks like Kim Kardashian. I really enjoyed getting acquainted with them at the telly, but since I definitely didn’t pick them up at the Crunchies, I digress.

If you actually care who won, you probably already know since the winners have been available, but I thought I’d post the winners with my own Drama 2.0 spin so read on.

Best Overall:

Facebook copied Friendster (and ) and added steroids.

Best Technology Innovation/Achievement: Earthmine

Earthmine has created the most complicated and best-sounding technology company description in history.

Best Clean Tech Startup: Tesla Motors

Tesla’s green sports car has captured the imagination of the small group of people who got really pissed off when they saw the movie, Who Killed the Electric Car? The company has pre-orders from some Titanic names, including Leonardo DiCaprio, and is scheduled to release the car this year provided that the remaining staff can fix the transmission problems.

Best Video Startup: Hulu

Hulu is trying to put television online “anywhere, anytime” so long as you’re in the United States. The company, called “Clown Co.” by Google, still has not gotten out of limited beta but is sure to destroy YouTube.

Best User-Generated Content Site: Digg

Digg defined the emerging social media revolution in which legions of geeks can promote content that appeals to the most important .01% of the Internet population. If you aren’t in good with the geeks that control Digg, getting “dugg” has also quickly become something that anybody with a little bit of cash can do.

Best Mobile Startup:

Twitter, the new addictive microblogging platform, helped those with no lives figure out how to spend their valuable time. But it wasn’t until after the South by Southwest conference that people realized just how important Twitter was of the human race.

Best International Startup: Netvibes

Based in London, Tariq Karim and Freddy Mini’s Netvibes has made waves in the U.S. as the company that throws cool launch parties.

Best Consumer Startup: Meebo

Meebo made instant messaging accessible to people who found it difficult to install instant messaging software. They then developed it into a platform where other sites could let their non-existent audiences chat with each other.

Best Enterprise Startup: Zoho

Zoho’s comprehensive online suite of 14 business applications ranging from document editing to CRM continues to be the leading tool that people don’t use to get away from the tyranny of Microsoft Office.

Best Design: SmugMug

SmugMug is sexy.

Best New Gadget/ Device: Apple iPhone

Robert Scoble actually camped out in front of the Apple store to get one so it has to be good, right?

Best Business Model: Zazzle

Looking for a Baby Gorilla t-shirt or memorable butterfuly kisses mug? Zazzle is CafePress 2.0.

Best Bootstrapped Startup: Techmeme

Founded and developed solely by Gabe Rivera, Techmeme serves as the front page of the tech blogosphere. The site’s advanced algorithms assume that the day’s top stories come from a handful of sites.

Best Startup Founder: Mark Zuckerberg ()

At 23, Mark is worth $3 billion and is arguably the most charismatic man in Silicon Valley. His ability to write heartfelt is fast becoming the stuff of legend.

Best Startup CEO: Toni Schneider (Automattic)

Schnieder has lead the company from its roots as an open-source alternative to Movable Type into a multi-million dollar enterprise that enables idiots like me to publish blogs easily. Thanks Toni!

Best New Startup: iMedix

iMedix combines search and social networking to change the way people find information about genital warts, Chlamydia, Syphilis and Gonorrhea. Users are encouraged to help each other by sharing their most embarrassing health experiences and links about horrible diseases from around the web.

Most Likely to Succeed: Automattic (WordPress)

The open source blogging platform that powers the Drama 2.0 Show is certainly going to succeed. Why? Because it powers The Drama 2.0 Show, of course.

Best Use of Viral Marketing: StumbleUpon

StumbleUpon lets its victims bookmark and discover useless sites they love. With only a Petri dish filled with $1.5 million, the StumbleUpon virus replicated to over 4 million Stumblers and soon infected eBay, the same company that bled $2.6 billion when it was infected with the even more virulent Skype hemorrhagic fever.

Best Time Sink Site: Kongregate

CEO Jim Greer describes Kongregate as XBox Live for casual time wasters. This site hosts some of the web’s most idiotic casual games. Remember Desktop Tower Defense? Okay, maybe you actually have a life.

Most Likely to Make the World a Better Place: DonorsChoose

DonorsChoose.org is dedicated to connecting classrooms filled with troubled students to Michelle Pfeiffers who want to help.

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