Posted on September 11, 2008
Filed Under Web 2.0 Kool Aid |
If ever there was a post that truly requires no more than “this says it all,” this would be it.
Yammer, the Twitter knock-off that asks its users to answer the question “What are you working on now?” has walked away with TechCrunch50’s top prize.
What more really needs to be said?
According to TechCrunch’s Erick Schonfeld, Yammer’s business model is “brilliant.” And it’s simple: companies that want to claim their “users” and gain access to administrative controls have to pay Yammer.
This extortion model might just be the most viable business model Web 2.0 has seen thus far. Of course, you still have to ignore the fact that there are a whole host of reasons most companies won’t and shouldn’t pay.
From data ownership to the protection of trade secrets and confidential information to Sarbanes-Oxley, Yammer is a solution providing a problem. Which is even more brilliant when you consider that most Web 2.0 startups have been solutions looking for problems.
But I digress.
At the end of the day, not only is this an indictment of the Silicon Valley herd-think that promotes pure stupidity over innovation, it’s an indictment of TechCrunch50.
After all, Yammer isn’t even a “real” startup. It was an internal tool built by Geni, a company founded by PayPal’s former COO that has already raised 8-figures worth of venture capital funding.
But I digress again.
Why fight the trend? I’ve decided to start building my Twitter clone for next year’s TechCrunch5000: Bangr.
Bangr is simple - it asks users to answer the question “Who are you fucking now?”
And if you thought Yammer had a brilliant business model, you’ll think Bangr’s business model is pure genius: if a Bangr user discloses that he or she fucked you and you don’t want your good name associated with that person in any way, shape or form as it relates to fornication, you can pay to have it removed.
Of course, Bangr will probably need to look outside of Silicon Valley for users. After all, there’s about as much hot sex in Silicon Valley as there are innovative technology companies.
On second thought, that might not be correct. I’m assuming that at least two people who met at one of the TechCrunch50 parties fucked. And when you throw in all of the individuals from “real” startups who took the time to present at TechCrunch50 (only to see a Twitter clone win) and all of the second-class citizens who Michael Arrington graciously allowed to pay to hang out in the DemoPit, more people got fucked at TechCrunch50 than innovative startups launched.
5 Responses to “Business-Oriented Twitter Copycat Wins TechCrunch50, Drama 2.0 Prepares Innovative New Startup, Bangr, for TechCrunch5000”
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you do realize geni is a techcrunch sponsor right?
moose: you have it all wrong. Geni and TechCrunch are friends with benefits.
Brilliant idea Drama, looking forward to seeing the product released and hope the price to have a name removed won’t be beyond reasonable
Svetlana: I’m not an unreasonable man. In my line of work, price is determined by ability to pay.
[…] knock off has a business model andthat is enough to make it new and shiny. Well I think Drama 2.0 put it best in a post about this disaster According to TechCrunch’s Erick Schonfeld, Yammer’s business model is […]